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Keywords:

• so i think i look pretty badass here

Comment: and not at all like i'm auditioning for zoolander.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• everybody shut up and get plastered

Comment: maybe that way i can forget any of this ever happened.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA but no

Comment: no really. no. nice try, but no. never. nope.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• this hat is kind of epic

Comment: and i honestly feel pretty wearing it.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• wait hold on you were serious?

Comment: i thought that was a joke because of how dumb it was.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• put my feet on the desk if i want to

Comment: and you can't stop me. YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• oh good a captive audience

Comment: now, should we talk about the many ways you owe me alphabetically?

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• i am so super grossed out right now

Comment: why would you show me a justin bieber sex tape. HAVE YOU NO DECENCY?

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• i'm going to pass out forever now

Comment: i need to find safer friends. possibly ones who garden.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• hang on i need to shoot you in your face

Comment: like RIGHT IN THE FACE on account of i fucking hate you.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• get that out of my face right now

Comment: why? because if it doesn't get out of my face, i'm cramming it up your ass, that's 'why'.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• why did you take my lollipop

Comment: can't you see how sad it made me? i was saving that lollipop and now it's gone.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• my cuticles are soooooo fascinating

Comment: what is not fascinating is you. you are in fact super boring, goodbye.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• you have serious emotional issues

Comment: and my professional, medical opinion is you should go diaf.

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)

Keywords:

• i might be uncomfortable with this

Comment: if you look back, a lot of our friendship ends with you naked on the floor. why is that?

Description: ✺ andѕoιѕyoυrғace (ιj)